First off just wanted to echo Danny’s condiments sentiments and say what a top performance Saturday!! Every single member of team played there part in the win even the subs that come on did a job. A big part of the club is the social side of things, it has to be when we loose but Saturday reminded me how good it is to win and turning in a performance like that gave us all a lift! Let’s keep it going.
So….second week into the ‘Retards Corner’ and already I have a cult following. Rod the sex pest was so pleased to see his name on the internet he sacrificed two of his favourite boys. Unfortunately for him just as he was zipping up the last part of his PVC dominatrix outfit the little beggars slipped through a whole in the basement door. He tells me not to worry; they won’t get far before the Moths he planted in their throat hatch and suffocate them. (see Silence Of The Lambs for those lost on that one)
It would seem that our resident barman and PB cueing expert Mr Chris ‘rug for chest hair’ Reid also enjoys our updates. Let’s be honest if it gives him five minutes of enjoyment we have already done more for him than he has done for Kat since they moved in together! Come on, a bit harsh maybe but those of us out of marital wed lock and living together know the truth…… Although, Rod was telling me something about an evening in where Chris and Kat had some root vegetables and a tube of low fat mayonnaise which cunningly doubled as lube! Ross’s ideal night in, kinky and you get a good meal out of it. (see James Paget A&E on a Friday night or Ron Jeremy’s good food guide for those lost with that one)
Before this gets too odd I better find my focus again!
Bratislava, or as I have now re named it, the final chapter of my life, catchy hey! I booked everything last week and final numbers are 21. Don’t ask me what happened there, either my maths is really bad or Darren’s thighs have got so fat I had to book two seats for them. You know the club has moved into a new era when other members of the team are getting the fat jibes before Ross, Danny and Landsy!
21 is the final number and as expected the cost has creeped up. The initial £150 hasn’t quite covered the flight and room due to hidden extras with Ryan air’s ‘low cost airline’. A £14 charge for each bag for checked in, a fee for booking with my card, an online booking fee which I find preposterous as it’s there USP (unique selling point for those of us not in the digital marketing industry!) and the cost of the flight goes up every time a seat is filled so booking for 21 makes the flat rate higher. At the moment I need an extra £6 from everyone but the old timers have got to cough up an extra £16 as they have forced me to upgrade there biddy room to en suite. If you ask me they want the separate room to hide their modesty, hung like wasps all three of them!
We don’t need to worry about this right now, Wally is gonna book the minibus for there and back and we will add the £6 to the total cost for the bus. Don’t ask me how much that is gonna be as it’s not my department.
Lastly I was talking to Ollie the Owl aka Smithy Sunday night and he quite rightly pointed out we leave on a Thursday night which also happens to be 2-4-1 nights in Hush. God help us, let’s just remind ourselves of how close I came to not making it through customs and not boarding the plane due to alcoholic consumption.
Thought for the day: Why do your farts always smell worse when you do them in the bath?
So….second week into the ‘Retards Corner’ and already I have a cult following. Rod the sex pest was so pleased to see his name on the internet he sacrificed two of his favourite boys. Unfortunately for him just as he was zipping up the last part of his PVC dominatrix outfit the little beggars slipped through a whole in the basement door. He tells me not to worry; they won’t get far before the Moths he planted in their throat hatch and suffocate them. (see Silence Of The Lambs for those lost on that one)
It would seem that our resident barman and PB cueing expert Mr Chris ‘rug for chest hair’ Reid also enjoys our updates. Let’s be honest if it gives him five minutes of enjoyment we have already done more for him than he has done for Kat since they moved in together! Come on, a bit harsh maybe but those of us out of marital wed lock and living together know the truth…… Although, Rod was telling me something about an evening in where Chris and Kat had some root vegetables and a tube of low fat mayonnaise which cunningly doubled as lube! Ross’s ideal night in, kinky and you get a good meal out of it. (see James Paget A&E on a Friday night or Ron Jeremy’s good food guide for those lost with that one)
Before this gets too odd I better find my focus again!
Bratislava, or as I have now re named it, the final chapter of my life, catchy hey! I booked everything last week and final numbers are 21. Don’t ask me what happened there, either my maths is really bad or Darren’s thighs have got so fat I had to book two seats for them. You know the club has moved into a new era when other members of the team are getting the fat jibes before Ross, Danny and Landsy!
21 is the final number and as expected the cost has creeped up. The initial £150 hasn’t quite covered the flight and room due to hidden extras with Ryan air’s ‘low cost airline’. A £14 charge for each bag for checked in, a fee for booking with my card, an online booking fee which I find preposterous as it’s there USP (unique selling point for those of us not in the digital marketing industry!) and the cost of the flight goes up every time a seat is filled so booking for 21 makes the flat rate higher. At the moment I need an extra £6 from everyone but the old timers have got to cough up an extra £16 as they have forced me to upgrade there biddy room to en suite. If you ask me they want the separate room to hide their modesty, hung like wasps all three of them!
We don’t need to worry about this right now, Wally is gonna book the minibus for there and back and we will add the £6 to the total cost for the bus. Don’t ask me how much that is gonna be as it’s not my department.
Lastly I was talking to Ollie the Owl aka Smithy Sunday night and he quite rightly pointed out we leave on a Thursday night which also happens to be 2-4-1 nights in Hush. God help us, let’s just remind ourselves of how close I came to not making it through customs and not boarding the plane due to alcoholic consumption.
Thought for the day: Why do your farts always smell worse when you do them in the bath?
